Just recently people in the neighborhood have stopped telling me the juiciest gossip. As a blogger, that’s mad respect! Along with the free beer a brewery had decided to send me, this was a clear sign that I had made it.
Then my editors announced that Metromix was being dismantled. The Tribune company overlords (who own Metromix, the Sun, and B) had spoken. Nevermind that Metromix has the largest, most up-to-date database on restaurants in the city; the Baltimore Sun’s not-as-awesome and already anemic entertainment section is taking over and I am out of a job.
I was doing my part, was I not? I was turning in the twice weekly funniness and interest. (A few more Booze and Old Bay posts coming before the apocalypse. Do not miss them!) I was hitting the new Baltimore spots and commenting sagely on them. I was paying for the Baltimore Sun even though the thing kept getting slimmer and they kept charging more and most of the comics in it are dumb as shit. I was even spending lots of clicks on Metromix myself, and clicks are like internet money. Ten page views make a click, and fifty click’s will buy you a link. The new currency.
But apparently that was not enough! The Tribune overlords needed more bang for their over-leveraged buck! Maybe they should just sell Wrigley Field like they were trying to and give me my job back.
I was pretty miffed before by the fake-money makers that caused this whole recession (I mean, it ain’t the common man’s fault for not knowing how to use credit, right? Right), particularly since they got boats and stuff. Now their not-operating-the-economy-like-the-masterminds-they-said-they-were has gotten personal. I got half a mind to find them on their boats and make them give me money.
But first: Anyone want to give me a job writing about Baltimore? I write like a shark eats fish.
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